When we become parents we imagine our lives to be idyllic. We are expecting some trying times, and of course an adjustment period. But overall, parenthood is a joyful and fulfilling experience.
However, for some parents that isn’t the case. What may appear to be the baby blues, extends for months. These people may not even realise that they are experiencing post natal depression or anxiety. It is estimated that up to 40% of parents are affected by post natal depression. It can occur to men and women, as well as adoptive parents or non-biological caregivers. Initially it has been diagnosed on people with babies up to 12 months post-partum. However, new research has indicated that it can occur in parents of children up to the age of 4.
So what is the difference between the baby blues and post natal depression?
The baby blues generally emerge around the third day after birth. It is accompanied by bouts of crying, feeling very emotional and generally feeling overwhelmed. But over the course of the next few weeks you will begin to feel yourself again, as your hormone levels slowly decrease back to normal and you adjust to your new circumstances.
If your symptoms persist for longer than two weeks, then you should consider getting assessed for post natal depression.
Some signs and symptoms of post natal depression (taken from www.pndsa.org.za):
These unusual symptoms will generally have been present most of the time, for a period of longer than ten days.
Mood swings are common and many women report feeling numb.
Depression:
- Feeling sad; suicidal thinking
- Feeling overwhelmed with fatigue
- Feeling hopeless
- Feeling guilty
- Feeling lonely, abandoned, unsupported
- Feeling no love for baby
- Forgetfulness, indecisiveness
Anger:
- Feeling out of control
- Feeling angry most of the time
- Fighting with other people
- Feeling irritable
- Feeling frustrated
- Feeling trapped
Anxiety:
- Feeling anxious most of the time; “knot in my stomach”
- Fear that she might harm herself, the baby or others
- Fearfulness: being alone, going out, unbearable, obsessive anxiety over health, her own, baby’s, baby’s father
- Panic attacks, feeling panicky
- Frightening thoughts; that she/the baby/her partner is not safe
Loss:
- Of joy
- Of motivation
- Of interest in previous interests
- Of interest in her own appearance, of taking care of herself
- Of interest in sex, loss of libido
- Of self-esteem and self-confidence
- Of concentration, of the ability to think clearly
- Of appetite – or control of appetite
Physical Symptoms:
- Loss, or dramatic increase, of appetite – comfort eating, or being unable to eat
- Weight loss or gain, beyond what is normal after having a baby
- Insomnia – can’t sleep even when baby is asleep; early waking; sleep disturbances; wants to sleep all the time
- Agitation, restlessness, or a general physical slowing down
Headaches, nausea, vomiting, other unusual physical symptoms
If you are experiencing some of these symptoms, it is important to get checked by a mental health professional. (Please see all contact details below).
So how can you recover from post natal depression?
There are several treatment options available, and you can choose the one that suits you best.
The first is psychiatric treatment that involves medication. A psychiatrist will need to diagnose you, and will be able to prescribe the appropriate medication. This can take up to 4 weeks to work, however, if you are prepared then the wait isn’t as agonising. Just knowing that you are getting treatment often helps ease the symptoms somewhat.
The second option is to go for therapy with a psychologist who specialises in post natal depression. Often therapy is combined with psychiatric treatment and has been shown to be highly effective in combination. But therapy on its own is equally as good. You will be able to discuss your feelings in a supportive environment and your therapist will lead you through the process of recovery.
The third option is to find a support group in your area. These groups are sometimes run by professional psychologists, but most of the time they are run by fellow post natal depression sufferers. These groups will offer you the chance to speak to others in your situation, and to get emotional support from them. The groups are not a replacement for psychiatric or psychological interventions, but can aid in the recovery process.
What resources are available for people that may want help?
If you or anyone you know may be suffering from any of the symptoms listed above, or if you are just struggling with the adjustment to parenthood without feelings of depression and anxiety, please contact the following people:
Post Natal Depression Support Association:
National Helpline (weekdays only): 082 882 0072. You can call or text this number and receive a reply within 24 hours.
Website: www.pndsa.org.za
Facebook: www.facebook.com/groups/pndsa/
In an emergency, contact your nearest hospital, or call Akeso Clinic’s emergency helpline number on 010 040 3775.
If you are seeking out a support group, or are unsure if you are suffering from post natal depression, contact Kirsten who runs a support group and support services in Fourways, Johannesburg.
Cell: 072 690 3836
Email: kirsten@kirstenmiller.net
Please don’t suffer in silence. This is a very treatable illness and you can make a full recovery if you get treatment early.
About the author:
Kirsten runs several mental health workshops focusing on support for trauma, depression, anxiety, body image and self-development. She also runs a private post natal support group in Fourways, and runs a community based post natal support group at the Witkoppen Clinic. She works under a registered psychologist and sits on the Gauteng committee of the Post Natal Depression Support Association. She is currently completing her honors degree in psychology. To find out more about her services please visit www.kirstenmiller.net